Kenner man who didn’t forward chain email takes full responsibility for 2020
Forget Coronavirus. Forget political and racial divides. The cause of the absolute sh*tshow that has been 2020 has been positively identified. A man who neglected…
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Louisiana officials advise public to start preparing now for 4 a.m. weather alert texts
Louisiana officials are actively monitoring the development of weather alert texts they say will begin affecting the state as soon as Thursday morning when Hurricane…
Dr. Morgus, New Orleans scientist who claimed to have cure for COVID-19, dies mysteriously
A cure found and a life lost. When premier New Orleans doctor-scientist Dr. Momus Alexander Morgus, also known as ‘Morgus the Magnificent,’ passed away at…
Prayer in school up 310,691% nationwide over this time last year
Sweating puddles of assumedly uninfected perspiration as they begin returning to campuses across the nation, teachers, staff, and students are praying more frequently and more…
State officials plead with Louisianans to stop trying to find ways to cook suspicious seeds
Louisiana officials are begging citizens across the state to please, please stop trying to find ways to use suspicious seeds turning up in mailboxes for…
Survey: 76% of New Orleanians Against Whatever It Is
In a recent survey, seventy-six percent of New Orleanians were found to be against whatever it is. Absolutely none of the respondents cared to know…
Workers trapped in Hard Rock hotel collapse cited by City for not wearing masks
Two workers who have been trapped inside the protected “historic pile” Hard Rock hotel since its collapse last fall in New Orleans were scheduled to…
Authorities confirm real plant found in Metairie office building lobby
A “suspicious object” incident in Metairie today has turned out to be a false alarm. Botanists from the Audubon Institute today confirmed a real live plant…
Massive head explosions from anti-maskers wipe Jefferson Parish off map after Lee Sheng executive order goes into effect
Approximately one minute after an emergency order by Parish President Cynthia Lee Sheng went into effect on Wednesday in Jefferson requiring all customers visiting businesses…
Hipster wishes he could have done more for iPhone that died in his hands
Disoriented, dehydrated, and, in his own words, “lucky to be alive,” local hipster Odin Williams endured more than three hours without his smartphone yesterday. Williams,…