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Latest News
  • September 26, 2022 | Beloved Louisiana weatherman dies in freak “spaghetti” accident
  • September 21, 2022 | New Orleans-developed “Go-Bag” aims to make muggings more efficient
  • September 1, 2022 | NOPD response time so sluggish bank robbers become multi-millionaires after re-investing money with same bank
  • August 24, 2022 | North Korea targets New Orleans for donation of foreign aid
  • August 9, 2022 | Lost civilization discovered in Lakeview pothole
Long-time Louisiana weatherman Jay Roberts was accidentally strangled to death today after he got caught in the 10:00 am ‘spaghetti model’ forecast for Hurricane Delta and couldn’t get out. “It was like something out of a science fiction movie,” said cameraman Bryce Peebles. “He was giving his report for the Noon broadcast, using the Accu-Weather Double Doppler Realistic 3D Projection Radar, and I guess he got a little too close. He accidentally fell back into the green screen, and he... just kept going.” A source at WAAP-TV said Roberts got his legs caught in the European ECMF ‘spaghetti‘ track and tried to pull himself free by grabbing onto the NHC ‘spaghetti‘ track. But that track got tangled around his arms and he couldn’t reach the edge of the probability cone. “He fell further in, and either the NOAA track or the UKMet track got wrapped around his neck. There was nothing we could do,” said the source. Fellow Louisiana weatherman, Neil Bleu, was devastated by the news.  “This is so tragic. If it had happened with the 4:00 pm spaghetti model, Jay would have survived. The tracks were much closer together and further to the West.”  With the news of Roberts' unexpected passing, Bleu predicted an 89% chance of showers streaming down the faces of the station's viewers this evening through Sunday. He also predicted a 60% chance of Roberts’ wake on Monday, with burial either Tuesday or early Wednesday, depending on what happens with that upper-level high coming in from Texas. A legendary Louisiana weatherman, Roberts found immense popularity through his "tell 'em what they want to hear" approach to reporting the forecast that viewers found comforting. He would take an online poll before every broadcast and basically went with whatever got the most votes. "The truth can be so harsh, and who needs that these days? There's so much bad and fake news today that people just want to hear good news and Jay gave it to them," Bleu commented. "Jay's forecasts may not have been right 60-76% of the time, but, hey, that's the life of a meteorologist."

Beloved Louisiana weatherman dies in freak “spaghetti” accident

Long-time Louisiana weatherman Jay Roberts was accidentally strangled to death today after he got caught in the 10:00 am ‘spaghetti model’ forecast for Hurricane Ian…

New Orleans-developed Go-Bag aims to make muggings more efficient - Neutral Ground NewsNikita Pavlov

New Orleans-developed “Go-Bag” aims to make muggings more efficient

Bank robber Elias Macmillan, one of his accomplices, and a few customers/new friends pose for a picture at some point during the six months when the multi-millionaire thieves took up a residence in the bank due to slow NOPD response time.All Go

NOPD response time so sluggish bank robbers become multi-millionaires after re-investing money with same bank

NK to NO: North Korea launches a foreign aid drive for New Orleans

North Korea targets New Orleans for donation of foreign aid

StockSnap

Lost civilization discovered in Lakeview pothole

​Entergy​ ​named "Highest Rated Power Company" in New Orleans for 27th straight year

​Entergy New Orleans ​named “Highest Rated Power Company” in city for 27th straight year

TSA rules against local emotional support animalGaetano Wanderlust

TSA rules against local emotional support animal coming aboard airplanes

S&WB Pump Stands in Front of Mirror Repeating "I Can Do This" as Rainstorm Targets New Orleans652234

S&WB pump stands in front of mirror repeating “I Can Do This” as rainstorm targets New Orleans

Tsvetoslav Hristov

‘Loud bangs’ in City Park really just fireworks this time, assures official in flak jacket

Shootings claim the lives of everyone in New-Orleans

380,000 shootings overnight kills everyone in New Orleans

The FBI is investigating a number of shootings across the city overnight that left everyone in New Orleans dead, raising concern that violence in the city…

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