Spinning an umbrella as if it were an alternate version of spin the bottle, New Orleans Mayor LaToya Cantrell recently professed her love for Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson and his wife Ciara in an apparently/obviously? drunk tweet.
Cantrell, who is married to attorney Jason Cantrell, saw rumors that Russell Wilson may be on the market and attempted to seduce the star quarterback by sending an unsolicited video.
“We not only admire you, we want you,” Cantrell said thirstily in a video shared from her official Twitter account, twirling a black and gold umbrella while wearing matching Mardi Gras beads and making the entire internet cringe collectively. “The culture of the city of New Orleans awaits you.”
Swinging for the fences/a little ménage à quatre, Cantrell made sure to include Ciara in her fantasy, trying to entice her with thoughts of headlining the annual Essence Festival.
Wilson and Ciara have responded to Cantrell’s offer for a ménage à trois nor returned her calls or texts, but a source close to the duo speaking anonymously said they were initially flattered but uneasy and ultimately turned off.
“Russ was a little curious at first and somewhat attracted to Cantrell when he glanced at the profile picture on her Twitter account but then he began watching the video with a totally different woman in it and immediately locked his phone, threw it deep across the yard, ultimately touching down in his pond. He felt like he was being catfished.”
The drunk tweet sent to Russell Wilson, which can be viewed below, contains graphic imagery and may be disturbing to most audiences. Viewer discretion is strongly advised. Seriously, turn back now. Don’t do it. Go do anything else, like use our New Orleans Meme Generator, Crossword Puzzle, or Word Search. Just don’t push play.