Saints, Patriots finalize cooks for butler deal
A highly discussed NFL trade involving frequent partners the New England Patriots and New Orleans Saints is finally complete. The Patriots’ underrated butler, Barnaby Pennywhistle,…
Sports
Pelicans GM Demps finalizes deal for team to land all-star DeMarcus Cousins
Calling it one hell of a deal, shocked league executives across the NBA are praising New Orleans Pelicans embattled general manager Dell Demps for…
New Orleans Pelicans pray for equality as NBA All-Star Game comes to town
As the Crescent City gears up to host the NBA’s All-Star Game this weekend, top executives from the New Orleans Pelicans are worried the “Equality”…
City of New Orleans to host Super Bowl parade for Atlanta Falcons
Offering immediate assistance after the Super Bowl to celebration starved Atlanta, Mayor Mitch Landrieu announced today that New Orleans will host a Super Bowl parade…
Locals protest Zephyrs name change to Baby Cakes by vowing to continue to not attend games
Vowing to never step foot inside the “Shrine on Airline” for another baseball game that includes the team formerly known as the New Orleans Zephyrs,…
Locals gear up to ignore New Orleans Pelicans season
With 82 NBA games on the horizon, locals are gearing up to completely ignore the 2016-17 season for the New Orleans Pelicans. “Uh, again?” Mid…
Due to poor time management, former LSU coach Les Miles expects to be out of office by April
It looks like former LSU coach Les Miles isn’t going anywhere, Tiger fans, at least for awhile. According to a source within LSU’s Athletic Department,…
LSU coach Les Miles’ career passes on suddenly
The LSU career of coach Les Miles, the longest-tenured coach in the SEC heading into the 2016 season, has passed on. According to a statement released by…
New Orleans Saints commit to winning one game for each decade in NFL
The New Orleans Saints today announced the franchise has committed to win five games this season, one for each decade they’ve been in the league,…
Saints fans ask team to reduce 50th-anniversary celebration to 12 non-shitshow seasons
Wanting to suppress decades of dreadful losses and disheartening frustration deep into their subconscious, thousands of New Orleans Saints fans are petitioning the team to please, please,…