Lost civilization discovered in Lakeview pothole
Traveling through New Orleans this week, a team of anthropologists discovered a lost civilization living behind the dense vegetation of a pothole in Lakeview. According…
Entergy New Orleans named “Highest Rated Power Company” in city for 27th straight year
For the 27th consecutive year, Entergy New Orleans is the top power company in New Orleans. The Association for Strategic Services and Hybrid Atomic Transference…
TSA rules against local emotional support animal coming aboard airplanes
The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) has started a crackdown on the profusion of so-called ‘emotional support animals’ that passengers are bringing on commercial aircraft. Besides…
S&WB pump stands in front of mirror repeating “I Can Do This” as rainstorm targets New Orleans
Continuously repeating a supposed confidence-boosting message its therapist recommends saying prior to going to work, a New Orleans Sewerage & Water Board drainage pump was…
‘Loud bangs’ in City Park really just fireworks this time, assures official in flak jacket
Looking to proactively calm the potential reactions of locals, city officials are reminding the public of the Happy 3rd of July event in New Orleans…
380,000 shootings overnight kills everyone in New Orleans
The FBI is investigating a number of shootings across the city overnight that left everyone in New Orleans dead, raising concern that violence in the city…
Scientist reveals hurricane season predictions based on how much interns can drink
The process scientists use for making hurricane predictions prior to every season isn’t nearly as scientific as one might think. According to a prominent scientist at Colorado…
Photo enforcement cameras to triple your donations to city on GiveNOLA Day
GiveNOLA Day, a one-day online giving event, is on May 3rd, and there’s an opportunity to support your favorite dysfunctional city. According to a draft…
NOAA predicts 0-100 hurricanes for this season in the Atlantic
The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration held a news conference at New Orleans City Hall today to reveal its predictions for the number of hurricanes…
God withdraws guardian angels from New Orleans over “safety concerns”
New Orleans — you are now completely on your own. Shocking locals and city leaders alike, God has announced He will be closing the pearly…