In her continued quest to boldly govern from anywhere but New Orleans, Mayor LaToya Cantrell has once again taken flight — this time jetting off to New York City to allegedly “participate” in a digital inclusion presentation with the African American Mayors Association (AAMA), which, according to its own website, doesn’t appear to be happening.
According to Fox 8, the AAMA site shows the group held its annual conference in April in Washington, D.C. (which Cantrell attended). It lists no official AAMA events today or this week.
“Look, I’m just trying to figure out what digital inclusion even means,” said resident Tyrone Baptiste. “Is that when the city finally replies to an email?”
His friend Taylor Trufant added, “I’d ask the Mayor, but she’s harder to reach than a live person on the IRS hotline during tax season.”
Despite the group’s blank calendar, the Mayor’s office insists her trip is official and part of a broader effort to highlight her commitment to important-sounding things. “The Mayor is honored to be wherever she needs to be when she feels like being there,” her spokesperson said, presumably from a tarmac.
Insiders say the trip may be less about digital inclusion and more about her long-rumored campaign to become the next face of Southwest Airlines’ Wanna Get Away? fares — a role she’s been aggressively workshopping since 2022. Rumors suggest the airline is launching a new elite travel tier named “Mayor Class.” Perks include: Unlimited flights with zero explanation, press statements pre-filled with buzzwords, and double miles when departing in the middle of a citywide issue, among others.
“It must’ve been invite-only,” said resident Latisha Carver. “So invite-only, the organizers forgot to invite themselves. That’s some extra high-class, elite-level shit.”
Sources also suggest the mayor’s frequent escapes may be inspired by Derrick Groves, the last known Orleans Parish inmate still on the lam after escaping custody in May. Groves’ ongoing freedom has reportedly “deeply resonated” with Cantrell, who reportedly now is more determined than ever to break out of New Orleans as often as possible in her final months in office.
“She’s out here putting in the miles and truly redefining hands-off leadership,” said a City Hall staffer, who asked not to be identified because they weren’t sure if the Mayor would return.
Mayor Cantrell is expected to return “later this week,” according to the city’s release, assuming no spontaneous conferences materialize in Rome, Paris, or the Denver Airport food court.
New Orleans residents are encouraged to digitally include themselves in city services until further notice.
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