A local man beat the eternal buzzer today when he attended Ash Wednesday services at St. Theresa of Avila in the Faubourg, ensuring his Catholic accreditation remains active for another two months.
After nearly letting his faith lapse, Garden District resident Tommy McGillis has successfully renewed his membership in the Church.
“I may not be punctual,” McGillis said, “but I am technically active, and it’s all part of the big plan.”
Church guidelines encourage weekly Mass attendance. However, parishioners can reportedly go up to two months before their status shifts from Active to Suspended Pending Eternal Review.
A suspended membership can cause significant issues if the individual dies and attempts to enter heaven while out of compliance.
“My Catholiciness is incredibly important to me,” McGillis said. “I look forward to Ash Wednesday every year because it’s the one day you can go to church the absolute bare minimum and still look like a full-time regular.”
To avoid any clerical errors, McGillis made sure to receive multiple inspection ashes.
“The membership office gets overwhelmed on Ash Wednesday updating accounts,” he said. “Especially after God pulled all his guardian angels out of New Orleans. I don’t want to get to the pearly gates and have a paperwork issue.
The Church declined to comment on individual accreditation statuses but encouraged parishioners to “stay current,” adding that it does not track compliance in 60-day intervals, though it acknowledges the perception.