If Trump drops out, Jindal ready to be knight in shining armor for Republicans

Neutral Ground News - New Orleans News - SatireDon Kiebels

Hoping the rumors about Donald Trump possibly dropping out of November’s election are true, former Louisiana Governor and presidential hopeful Bobby Jindal is crossing his fingers that the Republican party will look to him as a replacement candidate.

The GOP is scrambling to prepare for the possibility Trump withdraws from the presidential race, an unprecedented move that those in a coma couldn’t have seen coming. Jindal believes he can save the party in its hour of need.

“They need a white knight and I’m it,” a vastly paler Jindal said today when reached sitting idly by the phone and who admittedly hasn’t been outside in months. “My poll numbers were through the roof after that first debate, so the GOP knows I have the support and ability to go all the way.”

In fact, Jindal’s numbers did surge in the GOP poll after an electrifying performance at the Republican 2015 presidential “Happy Hour” debate, a debate held immediately prior to the debate among candidates who actually stood a chance of becoming president.

According to records, Jindal’s numbers jumped to a whopping .00009% overall to outpace all the other candidates at Cleveland’s Quicken Loans Arena packed with several dozen family members hoping to gain cabinet positions.

“I tell you what, I hope Trump does drop out so someone like me can right this thing,” Jindal said. “You have to put the people first. He disregarded his duties and deserted them. His erratic, self-serving, egotistical behavior keeps him from doing his job. With him, it’s all about the next step. BobbyJindalforPresident.com is paid up through 2024, so I’m totally ready to resume the fight. I can literally be our nation’s knight in shining armor. I have the outfit. Just call me, GOP. Anytime. Day or night. Seriously. Whenever. I’m available.”