Forget Coronavirus. Forget political and racial divides. The cause of the absolute sh*tshow that has been 2020 has been positively identified.
A man who neglected to forward a chain email last year has come forward to claim full responsibility for all that has happened over the tumultuous last 12 months.
Thiry-six-year-old Willie Foster of Kenner said he didn’t think much of the unassuming message that arrived in his Google mail inbox on September 19, 2019, despite its dire warning of immense bad luck, misfortune, and hardship in the future if not immediately sent on after viewing it.
According to Foster, the chain email had been forwarded to him by his 64-year-old aunt who would send “any and everything.”
“I took a quick glance because I accidentally clicked to open it,” Foster said. “It said something about all kinds of bad luck if I didn’t forward it to every one of my friends. Stupid stuff, like I would be so unlucky I would have to stay in my house for a year, have to wear a mask, lose tons of money, and my favorite bars would close forever. I couldn’t even go into Wendy’s. So, I deleted it.”
A few short months later the world began shutting down and has since been on the decline with any light at the end of the tunnel seemingly being witnessed only by those who pass on from Coronavirus complications.
“This entire year I’ve been forwarding every chain email, letter, text message, smoke signal, verbal story, whatever, in the hopes I’d reverse what I’d done, but it just seems to only get worse. My bad, y’all. I was careless. Hopefully that ‘Bill Gates is sharing his fortune‘ email I forwarded last week and not the ‘coronavirus microchip vaccine‘ one comes through in 2021.”