In an exciting development for the city-run City News, officials are proud to announce that Mayor LaToya Cantrell will now also serve as its first-ever Chief Foreign Correspondent. LaToya, who brings years of global experience and a knack for “meeting the people where they are,” will juggle her new journalistic duties alongside her ongoing responsibilities as mayor—a role she has no intention of relinquishing.
City News, a city-funded news service launched by Mayor LaToya Cantrell, aims to provide “unfiltered” updates directly to residents, bypassing traditional media outlets. Announced last month, the service claims to offer transparent reporting on local government initiatives, though critics have questioned its objectivity, calling it “the mayor’s personal PR machine.”
“LaToya brings unparalleled global experience, a knack for international diplomacy (especially at five-star resorts), and an uncanny ability to meet people where they are—as long as it’s not in New Orleans,” said a spokesperson for City News. “Her dual role allows her to share our city’s story from infinity pools, exclusive galas, and the finest in-room dining the world has to offer.”
Cantrell herself celebrated the announcement with characteristic enthusiasm. “On today, we are doing the work, and this new role is about meeting the people where they are,” Cantrell said, adjusting her sunglasses during the Zoom call from Santorini. “This title—Foreign Correspondent—is really just, you know, formalizing what I’ve already been doing as it relates to representing our great city, globally. It’s about culture, about connections, and, relative to the work, it’s about doing what needs to be done. Showcasing our city—our culture—one trip, or maybe three trips, at a time. Whatever it takes, that’s what I’m doing.”
When asked how she plans to balance her new role with her duties as mayor, Cantrell responded confidently. “Well, you know, the work doesn’t stop, right? We’re doing the work. We’ve been doing the work. And, as it relates to multitasking, I’ve mastered that. So, relative to serving the city, I’ll continue to meet the people where they are—whether that’s here, abroad, or, you know, wherever the work takes me.”
City News praised Cantrell’s ability to cover New Orleans’ issues with a global lens. Her first “assignments” as Foreign Correspondent include:
- A human-interest story about the challenges of organizing Mardi Gras-themed galas in London.
- Investigating how Paris’s crepes stack up to Crescent City beignets.
- Hosting a “mayoral roundtable” in Tokyo to discuss international ribbon-cutting techniques.
- A comparative study titled “From Beignets to Baklava: A Mayor’s Culinary Journey.”
- Reporting live from a beachfront cabana in Bali about coastal erosion—both there and back home.
“She doesn’t just report the news; she embodies it—albeit from a distance,” the spokesperson added. “Her commitment to experiencing global perspectives firsthand (and first class) is exactly the visionary approach City News values.”
News of Cantrell’s additional role has drawn mixed reactions from New Orleanians.
“Well, at least now there’s a job title that explains why she’s never around,” quipped Bywater resident Indigo Thibodeaux. “Maybe her postcards will fix the potholes.”
Others were less forgiving. “Foreign Correspondent? That’s rich,” scoffed Uptown resident Andy Landry. “My garbage hasn’t been collected in weeks, but sure, let’s get updates from her Greek villa.”
The City Council declined to comment, citing an urgent meeting to address Cantrell’s proposed $2.5 million “travel stipend for creative reporting.”
Despite the criticism, Cantrell remained unfazed. “Look, it’s the best of both worlds,” she remarked. “We’re doing the work, and this city is benefiting, bar none. It’s about leadership, about insights—global insights—and, as it relates to travel, it’s about being where the work is.”
City Hall confirmed that Cantrell will continue to serve as mayor, ensuring she retains all the perks, power, and parking privileges that come with the position. “Let me be clear—stepping back is not on the table,” she stated with a confident smile. “I’m doing the job, as it relates to leading this city, and I’ll continue to do it, bar none. And if the work takes me beyond City Hall, well, that’s just where the people need me.”
City News assures residents that Mayor Cantrell’s reports will keep everyone informed—time zones and stable Wi-Fi connection permitting.
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