As clocks rolled back this weekend, Louisiana officially re-entered Standard Time and, according to experts, substandard everything else.
While other states enjoyed an extra hour of rest, Louisiana used it to fall even further behind. Hope dimmed, leadership stumbled, and the state continued collapsing under the weight of its own headlines — proving once again that when it comes to falling behind, Louisiana leads the way.
Citizens expressed frustration and quiet embarrassment, though most admitted they’d already set their expectations back years ago.
Officials praised the time change as “one of the few things that still works here,” calling it a rare statewide event that didn’t end in scandal, outage, or indictment. Observers called it “a symbolic adjustment to where we already are,” assuring residents that no matter how far the clock falls back, Louisiana will always find a way to be further behind than everyone else.