Radioactive Shrimp Served on Bourbon
A radioactive Walmart shrimp allegedly linked to the recent recall was seen late Friday on Bourbon Street, reportedly glowing, hammered, and attempting to pick a…
Articles by Don Kiebels
Saints Only 25–30 Impact Players Away From Something Special Says an Optimistic Moore
Even with the understanding that this season will be a tough road for the New Orleans Saints rebuilding, head coach Kellen Moore believes the team…
Kellen Moore Names Himself Saints Starting Quarterback After NFL Approves Rare ‘Coach-Player’ Contract
While Who Dats argue over whether Spencer Rattler or Tyler Shough should be the Saints’ starter this season, the man making the call seems to…
Following Indictment, LaToya Cantrell Admitted Into Louisiana’s Elite Leadership Program
New Orleans Mayor LaToya Cantrell has officially been accepted into the Louisiana Political Leadership Master’s Program, a rigorous, immersive experience designed to prepare rising public…
Pole-Wielding Apparitions Caught on Camera Wandering Lafreniere Park at Night
Paranormal investigators are turning their attention to Lafreniere Park after multiple reports of “high-heeled shadows” and faint echoes of Pour Some Sugar on Me were…
New Orleans Named #1 Most Romantic City to Contract a Disease
The Crescent City, already known as the “Paris of the South” for its incredibly amorous atmosphere, has added yet another loving accolade to its extensive…
Report: Sheriff Susan Hutson Now Leading in Key Demographic of People Who Don’t Watch The News
A new poll conducted by the Gulf Institute of Selective Awareness shows New Orleans Sheriff Susan Hutson gaining strong support from a crucial voting bloc:…
New Research Indicates The Gulf is Getting Warmer Because KEVIN Won’t Stop Peeing in It
Scientists have discovered that the Gulf of Mexico is getting warmer, and they’re pretty sure they know why: one man’s pee. The man in question…
NASA Announces Mission to Chalmette for 2031
NASA is slated to undertake its boldest mission to date. The agency today announced it will send humans to the deepest reaches of Chalmette by…
Sidney Torres, Troy Henry to Settle French Quarter Garbage Dispute with 1-on-1 ‘Trashketball’ Game
With both the companies of Sidney Torres and Troy Henry now contracted to collect French Quarter garbage, city officials say trash won’t pile up, but…