That’s a wrap: Mayor Cantrell cancels Christmas in New Orleans until she gives the green and red lights
You can pout, you can cry, you can shout, but you will comply. Christmas in New Orleans is canceled. Santa Claus will have to cool…
COVID-19
Dr. Morgus, New Orleans scientist who claimed to have cure for COVID-19, dies mysteriously
A cure found and a life lost. When premier New Orleans doctor-scientist Dr. Momus Alexander Morgus, also known as ‘Morgus the Magnificent,’ passed away at…
New Orleans scientist says a cure for COVID-19 will be ready for October 31st
A cure for COVID-19 is closer to dark timeline reality thanks to a legendary New Orleans scientist. Dr. Momus Alexander Morgus, the celebrated mad doctor…
Prayer in school up 310,691% nationwide over this time last year
Sweating puddles of assumedly uninfected perspiration as they begin returning to campuses across the nation, teachers, staff, and students are praying more frequently and more…
New Orleans bars announce measures to ban Mayor Cantrell from ever showing her face again
Bars all across New Orleans have united in solidarity to protect citizens amid the devastating COVID-19 pandemic. New Orleans bar owners held a happy hour…
Workers trapped in Hard Rock hotel collapse cited by City for not wearing masks
Two workers who have been trapped inside the protected “historic pile” Hard Rock hotel since its collapse last fall in New Orleans were scheduled to…
Massive head explosions from anti-maskers wipe Jefferson Parish off map after Lee Sheng executive order goes into effect
Approximately one minute after an emergency order by Parish President Cynthia Lee Sheng went into effect on Wednesday in Jefferson requiring all customers visiting businesses…
98% of po’boys across Louisiana not even getting “dressed” during pandemic
Thanks to the COVID-19 pandemic, getting dressed is now proving extremely difficult both for the people of Louisiana and the po’boys they order, according to…
Cantrell: New Orleans restaurant diners must wear masks at all times even when eating
New Orleans restaurants diners! You can eat it! Figuratively. Mayor LaToya Cantrell has released new COVID-19 restrictions for the city as part of Phase One…
Mayor Cantrell orders every body in New Orleans to stay-in-place through May 16, give or take a year
The “stay-in-place” order for every single body in New Orleans is extended to May 16th, give or take several months to a year or two…